Thursday, December 9, 2010
Question of the Day: When online dating, is it possible for an "average Joe/Josephine" to find love when so many people appear shallow?
This particular question comes from a fellow member. I have to say, I hear many complaints from people who call me up looking for matchmaking or who attend my singles events looking for another avenue when it comes to dating. These people are jaded and turned off by online dating because they feel as though they're being overlooked by the opposite sex because they don't look a certain way, make enough money, have the "right" career, etc. One gentleman in particlar I can remember saying to me, "Women seem to only want men online that make a lot of money and are 6 feet tall. How am I supposed to meet anyone on there when they pass me up right away just based on some numbers on my profile?"
Well, to be fair, this problem goes the other way too and I hear complaints from women just as much as men. They say things like, "Why do men base everything on looks? It's not always all about that and if they took the time to get to know me, as a person, they would love me for me." They also complain that they see the same faces over and over again online and feel as though "the good ones" are either already taken or don't bother with online dating.
I look at it this way, it's a technical TOOL that can enhance your dating life, but certainly not something to be utilized as a be all, end all to finding your happily ever after. Anytime you're searching and scouring the earth for your next soul mate, you not only aren't going to find him or her, you're very likely to attract a lot of "scraps" and, basically, people that aren't up to your standards. Its the old addage which I stand by, that when you give up and say, "Screw it! I'm done," its then that miraculously, the bus unloads and voila...enter lover stage left!