Monday, May 10, 2010

Question of the Day: What were some lessons in love that your mother taught you?

With yesterday being Mother's Day, I find it only fitting to ask each of you to ponder some of the lessons in love that you learned from your mother. Be the messages healthy, dysfunctional, insidious, shallow, endearing or what-have-you, each of us were taught lessons in our youth about love that either enabled or hindered our love lives. We all had well meaning mother figure's in our childhoods that did the best they could in raising us, with the tools that they had. That said, somewhere along the line, we learned how to love and how to be in romantic relationships based on messages that were bestowed upon us while growing up.

Personally, my mother taught me some very valuable tools while growing up in how to handle many of my future romantic relationships. My childhood was far from perfect (whose wasn't?), however, mom taught me by example to listen to your inner-voice and that if something feels "off" or "wrong" in the relationship, it probably is. She also raised me to love important people in my life with everything that I had, because you just never know when they might not be around anymore. And that if you truly and genuinely love someone, don't hold yourself back from loving them openly and completely. Love unabashedly.

And my older sister taught me, also by example, to own your self-worth and to know that you are deserving of being loved in the way that you want and need. She also showed me to accept with grace and dignity when a guy just "isn't that into you" by facing it and letting go because it wouldn't be too long before the next, and BETTER one, would come around. Her strength continues to inspire me to this day!

So, on this Mother's Day, I encourage you to reflect on where and how you learned in your youth, some of your love techniques and habits. If you think about it, for most of us, the first time we felt loved was from our own mother's and as simple as it sounds, that was the biggest, most important lesson you will have ever learned. It was at that moment you knew you were a unique, precious and lovable human being who was capable and worthy of love. And then you realized you were capable of reciprocating in kind. Is there anything you can think of more important than that? Thank you Moms. Happy Mother's Day!

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