Tuesday, July 13, 2010

Question of the Day: When it comes to dating, are you more like Carrie (The Constant Victim), Miranda (The Pessimist), Charlotte (The Picky Perfectionist), Samantha (The Commitment-phobe)?

Gosh, when I really think about it, I've been each of these characters in my dating life, at what point or another. The Sex & the City characters, Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte and Miranda, are good examples of women who dealt with self-sabotaging dating patterns.  Each dating pattern reflects specific love relationship challenges that many single people face.

Carrie - For the most part, Carrie tended to settle for crumbs throughout her dating life.  She accepted seductive and inconsistent treatment from a guy who was ultimately out of her reach and afraid of commitment (Mr. Big).  She also found herself in relationships where she was put second to his career or other women (Russian artist, Aleksandr Petrovsky).  Then, when she did find a man who truly loved her, she ended up cheating on him and pushing him away in order to reclaim her victim status (Aidan).  Do you have thoughts that you don't deserve a relationship in which you come first?

Miranda - I'm referring to Miranda as "The Pessimist" because although she was always afraid of being alone, she remained pessimistic about finding a great guy.  She would end up dating men that she felt were beneath her or only became interested in them once they left her (Steve).  Do you have a low self-image and tend to think that you can't compete with others for a really great mate?

Charlotte -  Fussy and a perfectionist.  Hell, she almost passed on Harry Goldenblatt, a man who was good husband material but balding & unpolished.  Remember the time she refused to go to a beach party with him unless he waxed his back?  She was also judgmental and constricted about sexuality.  Do you tend to be self critical in nature and perhaps judge anyone who would want you as "not good enough?"

Samantha - She was endlessly claiming she didn't want a monogamous relationship, would leave lovers for no apparent reason, and was extremely fearful of intimacy (Smith holding her hand in public).  The thought of commitment was terrifying to her.  Do you feel you might have an underlying need to be claimed, almost against your will?

So, which "Sex and the City" character do you mostly identify with?  True, these types are not mutually exclusive, but if you had to narrow your style down to one, who would you choose?  Well, it's not surprising to me that I identify with the woman whom I not only share a name, but date the same men and have similar relationships.  (As I sit at my laptop writing a blog and complaining about it!  Oy, I need a hobby!)

No comments:

Post a Comment